Good ol' Charlie Gibson and the ABC Nightly News is coming to broadcast from my fair town and I need some ideas on how I can get my 15 minutes of fame, after which I plan on spending some time in a rehab center. I could be in the background in a pirate outfit or something, but in this day and age I don't think that will cut it. Of course, JUST in case it doesn't work I do ask that your ideas do not entail me getting arrested, fired or run out of town by a angry pitch-fork weilding (sp?) crowd.

Thank you in advance for your help.